Wild West Madness

Wild West Madness is a fanon episode of HTF.

Starring

 * Howdy
 * Zekey

Appearances

 * Flaky
 * Pop
 * Cub
 * Lumpy
 * Toothy
 * Leif
 * Pan
 * The Mole

Plot
Sheriff Howdy steps out of a store with a bag of jerky. He takes a bite and, after struggling, rips a tough piece of jerky and eats it. His snack time is interupted by Flaky's scream. Flaky runs past him and he looks to find an outlaw, Zekey, in the distance. Howdy steps into action and challenges him to a classic western fast draw.

Flaky hides in a barrel while Pop hides behind a building, pulling in Cub as he wanders away. After several minutes, Howdy calls in the draw. Zekey fires his pistol out of conrtol. Howdy tumbles out of the way and into a bar.

The Mole plays a piano as the action goes along. Toothy and Leif enjoy mugs of rootbeer until Leif is blown to pieces. Toothy sighs in relief, when a bullet blasts his mug and kills him with shattered glass. Bartender Lumpy cheers on the fight. Pan plays a panflute when some bullets shoot into it, causing him to shoot the bullets out machine-gun style. Bullets fire out all side of the walls and the bar soon crashes down. Howdy crawls out, but Zekey fires his last bullet. He shoots at Howdy's bag of jerky and angers him. As he jumps back into the fight, The Mole, also aving survived, continues playing the destroyed piano.

It is now Howdy's turn to draw his gun. He fires a single bullet which Zekey dodges. However, the bullet hits a cactus, a corral, and a wagon. Zekey laughs at the missed shot until a piece of the cactus impales his eye. The cattle who escape from the corral then stampede over him. Finally, the wagon runs him over. Vultures arrive to eat his corpse.

Howdy celebrates his victory by picking a piece of jerky off the ground. He takes a bite but couldn't seem to rip it apart. He keeps trying until he eventually rips out his skull.

Moral
"Don't fire your gun away from the target!"

Deaths

 * 1) Leif is shot by bullets.
 * 2) Toothy is killed when his glass mug shatters.
 * 3) Lumpy and Pan die when the bar collapses (confirmed by writers).
 * 4) Zekey is impaled by a cactus, stampeded, and ran over.
 * 5) Howdy rips out his skull trying to eat jerky.

Trivia

 * This is the first episode since? Dial L for Lumpy? which explores Howdy's craving for jerky.
 * Howdy's death is similar to Lumpy's death in one of the options of Lumpy's Lame Card Trick.
 * Cro-Marmot,? Chopstix, and The Dragon? were originally meant to be in this episode.