Dead as a Doorknob

Dead as a Doorknob is a fan episode. In this episode, Decay becomes a nurse.

Starring

 * Decay


 * Sal

Featuring

 * Sly


 * Flippy


 * Xiggles


 * Abscess

Plot
Decay is getting a pair of prosthetic legs, when she sees the price. She gets out her wallet, which immediately disintegrates due to age, along with it's contents. Decay growls grumpily. Later, Decay is crawling along the sidewalk, sad that she could not afford the prosthetic legs. All of the sudden, she spots a "now hiring" sign at a hospital. Excited, Decay quickly crawls in and applies for the job. Later, Decay greets Sal. Sal nervously says hello. Decay sees Flippy get wheeled in by Xiggles. He has a wooden stake impaled in his stomach. Sal is about to pull the stake out of his stomach, but Decay manages to get to Flippy first. Decay attempts to pull it out, but ends up pulling out his intestines with the stake. Sal screams at the site of this, but Decay places the stake back in. Decay then slowly pulls the stake out of Flippy's stomach, but slips and falls, ripping out the stake, along with Flippy's intestines and veins. Sal faints, but Decay performs CPR on her, getting Sal electrocuted in the process. Sal then yells at Decay and slaps her, ripping off her head. Sal screams when she sees what she did to her. All of the sudden, Decay's head starts to move, indicating that she is still alive. Sal backs away from Decay's head, which rolls back onto her neck. Decay then gets up and forces her head down, thus replacing her head. Abscess is then wheeled in by Xiggles, having been cut in half at the waist. Decay begins to stitch him back together, but she accidentally impales Abscess in the eye. Abscess starts to cry and scream in pain, while Decay hastily and sloppily tries to correct herself. She rips the needle through Abscess' eye. Abscess dies from shock due to this. Xiggles frowns angrily upon seeing this. Sal then sighs sadly, thinking that she will lose her job for this. Xiggles then wheels in Sly, who was shot in the head. Decay proceeds to pull out a scalpel. Sal sees this and thinks her career will be doomed if Decay messes up. Sal attempts to stop Decay, who successfully removes the bullet that got lodged in Sly's head. Sal stops and sighs in relief. However, Decay throws the bullet behind her head, and it ends up flying through Sal's head. Sal faints. Xiggles screams when she sees this, but she too has the bullet rip through her head. Later, Decay buys the prosthetic with money that she earned at her job. She puts them on, but they rip through her body and shoulders. Decay frowns angrily as the episode ends.

Moral
"Be yourself!"

Deaths

 * Flippy's intestines are ripped out.
 * Abscess dies from shock.
 * Sal has a bullet rip through her head. (Debatable)
 * Xiggles also has a bullet rip though her head.

Injuries

 * Flippy has a stake impaled In his stomach.
 * Abscess is cut in half, and then has his eye impaled and ripped.
 * Sly is shot in the head.
 * If not killed, Sal was injured when the bullet ripped through her head.